And you are so proud of it. You have no knowledge of html and the like, but your little web site sits bravely in the ether. You visit all the major search engines and painstakingly submit your URL. You visit other sites similar to yours and politely ask for a link. You check the Link Rankings at least twice a day to see if your brand new site has been indexed, and smile smugly as Yahoo, Google and the others acknowledge your tiny space on the Internet .

This state of euphoria stays until someone says, " but you have frames - Google hates frames," and your despair grows deeper when someone else asks you if you have optimised your site. You will not admit it, (no one wants to look like a dummy do they?) but you have no idea what they are talking about, so you smile and say, "of course, hasn't everyone?"

When you are alone, you log on and search the Internet for optimisation tips. Thousands of helpful tips are found, at least they would be helpful if you knew what and where a root directory is; where you could find and should put a meta tag, knew something about RSS, and possessed even the slightest knowledge of html.

The despair deepens, until you finally accept that unlike you, the rest of the world is html literate. After that it is easy, you just abandon your site, and take up golf!

Parish Chest

http://www.parishchest.com